Christmas with a capital C!

Christmas Eve! Great service at CCV tonight. Helped me get in the right frame of mind. Holiday sales, santas, snowmen, stress.. all fade away when you focus on the simple beauty of the reason for celebration- God with us.

Have to work tomorrow and through Saturday. Nurses just don't get great vacays!

Working on some improvements in my life. Feeling good and with direction.

Another topic. Was at a friends house for a little party recently. Met friends of my friend that I have heard about in the past. We mix like oil and water. I kept thinking how they were acting annoying and immature. Might be my personal problem. Better to be alone than be around people that you don't love? Maybe I need to make more of an effort?

Let It Be

It's been quite awhile since I've written anything and it's not from lack of wanting. I find myself with a little free time this Sunday evening and also with a pensive air, and so it seems appropriate to sit for a spell and write. Beyond other things that are giving me an ulcer right now, I must confess I am spending a lot of time thinking about my faith (lack of) and how I wish I could get a "revelation" like the Third Day song belts out. Wouldn't it be so easy if I could just touch the intangible, hear the voice of the One who speaks all around me but I seem to be deaf to, or feel the touch of love that I know encompasses me. I can't feel Him, I don't see Him and my words of love are devoid of emotion. But what I know, I know for sure. Lord, help my unbelief. I won't part from You. I will continue to seek. To cry. To hope. All the happy people with all the happy faces- is anyone feeling the way I feel?
I do love Christmas. I love the carols, the lights, the excitement, and the feeling of good will towards men. Thank you for turning the world upside down with Jesus' birth, God! I love it.
When I read a book I [sometimes] am so impressed with the imagination and creativity of the story that I wonder why my life's story doesn't have that richness. You are more creative than any simple author anywhere, God! So, author of my life.... will the page turn to an interesting sentence soon? Then, I remember; it's all about You. So, let it be. Let it be. Let it be a song so sweet- let it be.

Life Lessons From Tetris

My favorite shape is the three little squares in a line and one square sitting on top. That shape can usually be fitted anywhere. This game has got to be one of the best ever invented. As I was playing on my phone the other day I was thinking about what lessons I'm learning that I could apply to my life.

1. Sometimes you need to clear up a little mess (one line) just to keep things in control before you can make the big mess go away (4 lines at once).

2. When life comes at you fast (level 9) it's even more crucial to make the best decisions- one mistake and you may not recover.

3. Don't panic (screen changes to red). If you continue doing what you know needs to be done, things will get calm again.

Dear Diary,

My eyes are drooping but I wanted to write bc I don't want to get back in the habit of ignoring the blog. Had a fabulous weekend. My cousin Danny got married and all the extended family was in town and we had the opportunity to laugh and reconnect.

My sister got her promotion and is now relocating to San Antonio. I am so proud of you, Esthera. She is proof that you can do anything you put your mind to. I will miss her dearly. Hope this is just an interim to our lives being lived in the same state.

One of my long lost brothers also showed up to the family gathering this weekend. It is truly so hard seeing a family member struggle. I love you, Jake. I wish I could heal your hurt and fix every problem in your life. We all make mistakes. I, too, have been down and out and we all are in need of help. I wish you could see that you are not alone. I wish your need for acceptance, forgiveness, freedom from your past could be realized. God is so merciful. It is a blessing you are alive and we all need to be reminded that it is a miracle to have life. My life story would not be the same without you and I wouldn't change our family for the most perfect in this world.

No Cheese With This Whine

A lot has happened in the last few days. Most recently, I went to IKEA to get the hardware I was missing for my bed (it never did turn up). The cool thing is that I discovered that you can go to the customer service counter and they have a lot of miscellaneous parts that they give out for free. Considering all their stuff is "DIY", that's a pretty good idea. So yay for the idea!.... and nay for the checkout procedure!

Of course, I had to take a turn around the store. And did find some cool wood frames for fabric... anyway, I digress. When it was time to "checkout" I put my bag of goodies on the checkout thing and the checker says, "can you take everything out of the bag". Ummm, Ok, guess this isn't the same as the grocery basket! There was nobody in line and she's just sitting there watching me. Then, you have to "bag" everything yourself- but their are no bags! So, pay 59 cents for a new bag and stuff everything in and wonder if this is how they do it in Sweden. We're in America now! Long live customer service!!!